Can We Passover Trump?

He Is Such A Bitter Herb!

Apr 5, 2023

Tonight Jews worldwide will settle down to a ritual called Passover, kinda like Thanksgiving, which is the goyish version…really. What these two holidays have in common is the obligatory meal with family members that historically can go all sorts of wrong, especially in this post-Trump bumbling down the escalator era where politics has poisoned the otherwise pleasantry of family reunions.

But unlike Thanksgiving, where Americans celebrate—in denial—the fact that they destroyed the lives of countless Indigenous people, Jews get to rejoice that we are no longer slaves in Egypt. Yes, Jews were slaves. We helped build the friggen pyramids. It’s hard to imagine that humans schlepped those gigantic boulders through the scorching sun in the desert up a fucking incline. Let alone, Jews. But it’s true. We were slaves. And on Passover, we gather to talk about that terrible time in our history. We take pride in humbling ourselves to be reminded of our blood, sweat, and tears. We defy those who enslaved us by remembering because there is no shame in our past. Rather, there is beauty in remembering where we came from so we can fully appreciate how far we have come. Frankly, I recommend this process to everyone. Because denial isn’t a river in Egypt, it is a pox on your soul. Just look at the MAGA Trumplicans. Need I say more?

So tonight, what say we make a Passover pledge to not talk about politics, aka Trump derangement? Or how old Joe is. Let’s taste the sweetness of family and friends coming together for a tradition designed to bring people together and find joy in delicious food and good cheer. And let’s also pray that we’re not in some Civil War or World War III before Thanksgiving.

PS…Fuck You, Meatball Ron.

Peace…
Abe - Won’t Be Silent

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