Another Day, Another Plane Crash—But Don’t Worry, Donald Trump Is President
Will This Unfortunate Incident Open Pandora's Box Even Further?
[SIDEBAR] A Moment of Silence for Those We Lost
Before I dive into the larger conversation about airline safety, government failure, and executive greed, I want to take a moment to honor the victims of this tragic crash in Washington DC. My heart goes out to the families and loved ones affected. No amount of corporate damage control or political finger-pointing can bring them back, and they deserve more than empty condolences.
What they do deserve is accountability. Real accountability. Because as we’ll explore below, this wasn’t just an accident—it was the inevitable result of systemic failures that put profit over people.
Sadly, America is struggling with the horrific news about another plane crash, another round of performative outrage, and another excuse for politicians to blame the wrong things. But don’t worry, folks—Donald Trump is at the podium! Pissing off half of America even more than he did yesterday, but I digress. Surely, Donzie will solve this crisis with his signature blend of bloviating, zero expertise and maximum confidence with just the flick of his Bic.
Meanwhile, get a good look at the executive pay of airline CEOs—because while your flight safety is hanging by a thread, these guys are raking in beaucoup bucks.
[SIDEBAR] Want two people in the control tower instead of one? Sorry, no budget.
Want fewer near-misses and last-second runway aborts? Sorry, can’t afford it.
Want an executive to cash out an extra $10 million in bonuses? Oh, absolutely!
As the chart above shows, some CEOs are raking in tens of millions of dollars while simultaneously nickel-and-diming passengers, slashing maintenance budgets, and—oh yeah—not hiring enough air traffic controllers because that would just be too expensive (The Times). That is sure to piss off the “Eat the Rich” crowd.
Speaking of which, remember the recent hullabaloo named Luigi Mangione? He’s the man who—in what can only be described as a horrifically misguided act of frustration— took out his rage on UnitedHealthcare CEO Brian Thompson. Now, let’s be clear—murder is bad. The fact that people weren’t shocked—in fact got excited by Luigi’s very essence—or was it his abs—when he snapped and took matters into his own hands scared the pants of many CEOs. They were shocked that Luigi’s story was being hailed as ‘a hero’s journey’. Yes, his journey will end in slammer getting slammed—so, there’s that. But the fact remains, somehow vigilante justice is as American as apple pie, which is not a pun when certain people get ‘just desserts’. This should also tell you everything you need to know about how much public trust in leadership has disintegrated.
Trump’s hot take was to blame DEI and the Democrats! Naturally, Donald J. Trump, a man whose understanding of aviation safety likely begins and ends on Air Force One— bucket of KFC in tow—jumped in with his signature wildly inaccurate take. Instead of owning up to decades of corporate greed, FAA underfunding, and deregulation, he went straight for his favorite boogeyman: “wokeness.”
Because obviously, the real reason planes are crashing isn’t corporate negligence or years of gutting safety regulations—nope! It’s diversity! Clearly, if we just had fewer women and minorities in aviation, gravity would suddenly respect capitalism and mistakes would never be made. ‘Cause maybe white men can’t dance, but they sure know how to keep jetliners in the air.
The U.S. aviation industry is now a full-fledged disaster movie in real-time. The airlines are pocketing billions, air traffic controllers are quitting in droves, and passengers are left hoping their pilots got a full night’s sleep. Not to mention that they had to overcome the reputation of being alcoholics. Remember that? Meanwhile, political leaders are too busy blaming “woke culture” to actually do anything—and the public is left wondering whether they should start driving cross-country instead.
[SIDEBAR] I have my own conspiracy theory as to what went down in the Potomac River but for now, I will keep it to myself.
Peace…ABE
