All Dogs Go To Heaven...
While Most Trump Supporters Will End Up In Hell...You'll See.
Today was one of those days that we dog (cat) owners dread: sending the love of our lives to the next realm. As difficult as it is, we must do what’s best for the dog (or cat). Woodstock, who lived his best life ‘til he was 19 years old, went to heaven today to play with all the other dogs and cats. Of course, there are tears and sadness, but when you know you’re doing the best thing for the animal, God is working in your life.
SIDEBAR: God is a concept, a power greater than ourselves. Atheists, just humor me.
On the ride home from the Beverly Hills Small Animal Hospital (best place ever), I started getting angry at why the good die—maybe not young in the case of Woodstock, but—young when I think of my father, who at age fifty, died suddenly. He, like Woodstock, definitely went to heaven. I’m angry because men like my dad, who did so much good while he was alive, like saving countless people’s lives in Europe after World War II, don’t get to enjoy the fruits of their labor.
Contrary to most American people’s knowledge, after we defeated the Nazis, what wasn’t defeated was antisemitism. No, it continued, and, well, lookie here, it’s flourishing right on our bloody shores. By Jove, it’s being nurtured through our education system, too.
The forces of evil are bombing synagogues and random acts of violence. We also have a fresh crop of newbies protesting their tits off while shouting, “Annihilate Israel,” which is a nice way of saying, “Kill the Jews.” For Christ's sake, they’re shutting down bridges, turnpikes, airports, museums, and even St. Jude’s Hospital. Betcha, these fuckers thought it was a Jewish hospital because they’re that idiotic, or is it blinded by their hatred. And/or they can’t spell? Am I being too mean? Arrest me.
Plus, we have blubbery Trump, who by now technically should have exploded since we know how he eats, doesn’t sleep, and pounds down 12 Diet Cokes a day. Not to mention whatever crap (crack) he is snorting, which is so obvious because, at his hideous merch-filled rallies, he literally snorts and yammers on and on incoherently.
My point is that dogs (cats) shouldn’t die at all, good people shouldn’t die young, and horrendous Trump supporters—who threaten civil war and worse—should not be breathing on Earth anymore. Nor should racists and antisemites, but who’s counting?
Getting back to the God thing, if my dad didn’t get to live a nice long life, why do these pricks get to stink up the planet for way too many years, many of whom are GOP members of Congress? It’s not fair, life’s not fair, and if we lose our God-damned democracy, well, maybe Woodstock is a lucky dog after all.
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Oh, Abe! Rosie (cat) and Woodstock are together, having hors d’oeuvres and martinis, laughing at how funny the book is, how they loved listening to us all summer and how they can’t wait for publication. Thank you for remembering not just the dogs we love but also the furballs. xoxo
I am so sorry about Woodstock and although we know we are doing the last act of kindness we can do for them it’s heartbreaking. As for the rest totally agree as usual.